Always Need You
by Simpleplanlyf
Summary: Buffy is still depressed after sending Angel to Hell even though he's back with her. The thoughts overflow her mind making her do something she would regret. (Sometime in Season 3)
1. In the library

Faith, Buffy and Willow were browsing around the stacks while Xander, Oz, Cordelia and Giles were sitting down at the table going through piles of old books. Xander closed one of the books and sneezed on the dust, "God I hate old books."  
  
"We know," Cordelia said plainly while turning the page of the book in front of her, "We have nothing else to do so Giles wants us to look in these books."  
  
Willow came down the stairs over to the table, "Nothing good up there except very old Stephen King novels. Some of them are good.the movies are better." She sat down next to Oz, "Find anything yet?"  
  
Oz shook his head, "Only the stuff we know about and the demons Buffy and Faith have already faced. Nothing good here."  
  
Faith was reading a big book on the floor when Buffy came over to her. Buffy glanced over Faith's shoulder, "What are you reading?"  
  
"This book on tall tales, fables, fairy tales and other children related things. Can't believe Giles actually has a book on this in a high school library," Faith laughed as she flipped the pages.  
  
Buffy laughed a little, "Those are old. You like those things?"  
  
"Oh yeah, I loved them as a child. My cousin would always tell me urban legends and myths about weird and evil things and I actually believed it. He would always find ways to scare me but eventually I didn't. I liked them, some were funny and some were pretty strange," Faith said closing the book and holding it in her lap, "Wanna head back down?"  
  
"Sure," Buffy said as she walked down to the table with Faith. Faith placed the book on the front desk and went over to the others. Xander had finished going through another book and took one off the pile. Cordelia groaned, "This is very boring! Can we please do something that is not related to books or a library.no offense Giles."  
  
"None taken," Giles said walking to his office. Xander turned to face Cordelia, "You know, there is a thing you can do. You can go out and get us all dinner or we can keep you here and you can help me whittle stakes."  
  
Cordelia widened her eyes, "Whittle stakes? Again? You're crazy! The last time we did that, I ended up with a dozen splinters and cramps in both of my hands. I am NOT gonna do that again."  
  
"Then get dinner. It's your choice," Xander said glancing back at the book he was reading. Cordelia gave a long sigh then got up and walked out through the doors. Buffy looked at Xander, "Nice one."  
  
Xander smiled at her. Buffy gazed up at the clock on the wall then nudged Faith to go. 


	2. On patrol

Buffy and Faith headed toward the graveyard where they met up with Angel. He had been waiting for them for a short time. Buffy walked up to him, "Hey, were you waiting long? Cause Faith and I were reading.not reading like you do just doing the reading as Giles likes to do or is it called research instead?"  
  
Faith looked at Buffy strangely then looked at Angel and shrugged. Buffy put her hand to her head, "I can't believe I said that.I sounded like a total idiot."  
  
"No Buffy, it's ok. I wasn't waiting long. I just walked here a little while ago, I was wondering what you guys were doing," Angel said.  
  
"Research," Buffy said quickly, "I think.well, we were just going through the different books Giles has and seeing how they are.which is good I think."  
  
Faith tried not to laugh but covered it in a cough. Buffy shot Faith a look before facing Angel, "I'm not feeling myself today.must have been the overload of sugar Xander fed me this afternoon. I knew I shouldn't have had that fifth bag of M & M's."  
  
"So that's why you and Xander were overly excited," Faith laughed, "Seeing both of you jump up and down like little children was." She stopped after she saw the look on Buffy's face, "Sorry."  
  
"It's ok Faith," Buffy said then looked up at Angel, "So.have you found anything yet?"  
  
Angel shook his head, "No, I haven't seen anything. They must be stubborn tonight."  
  
Buffy sighed, "Well, it was worth coming out here I guess. Anyways, Faith and I are gonna head home so we'll see you." Without warning, a vampire grabbed Buffy from behind and threw her to the ground. Faith tackled the vamp while Angel helped Buffy up to her feet. Buffy searched her pockets for her stake, "My stake! Where's my stake?? I know I had one!"  
  
"I didn't see one," Angel said while punching the vamp in the face. Faith saw Buffy's stake on the ground and dove to get it, "B! Here!" Faith threw it to Buffy and she caught and staked the vamp. Faith jumped up and dusted herself off.  
  
"Well, that was fun," Buffy smirked as she put her stake in her jacket pocket, "Now is the time where I can go. I haven't got much sleep last night and I really wanna go to bed so I'll see you guys later." Buffy kissed Angel on the cheek before walking out of the graveyard.  
  
Faith was smiling when Angel turned to face her, "I'm not saying anything. Besides, I was gonna head out as well. Take care big guy. See you later." She patted him on the shoulder before leaving. 


	3. An old friend or foe

Buffy walked up to her front door but stopped in front of it. She looked around and walked over to her tree and pulled Spike out from behind, "Playing personal stalker?"  
  
"Not doing anything love, I'm just out on a stroll," Spike said.  
  
"I'm amused," Buffy said sarcastically, "What are you doing here?"  
  
"I told you. I'm out on a stroll, it's not a crime is it?" Spike asked smirking.  
  
Buffy narrowed her eyes a little, "Not to anyone else but me. I don't like it when you're around my house, I have a feeling you're up to something."  
  
Spike laughed, "Oh sure, I'm gonna barge in and steal all your precious treasures. That's a good plan actually." Buffy glared hard at him. Spike took out a pack of cigarettes from his duster pocket, "Only kidding pet. I have a soul remember? I'm suppose to suffer for all the bad things I did.like Angel, except I'm not dating the Slayer."  
  
Buffy lost her temper and punched him in the nose. Spike stumbled back a few steps, "Sheesh, you can't take a bloody joke. Even if I did, she'd probably kick my ass every day."  
  
"You're really pissing me off you know that?" Buffy said with anger in her voice, "Sometimes, I regret ever inviting you into my home."  
  
"I helped you beat Angel," Spike said.  
  
"Cause you wanted to help your sluttly girlfriend. I had to send him to Hell because he opened the gates. Do you know how hard it is to lose the person you love so much?" Buffy nearly cried.  
  
Spike lowered his head down in shame, "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings love. If you want, I'll get out of your sight."  
  
"No Spike, it's not your fault. I'm sorry.it's just hard for me to get over the incident, you don't know how hard. I just feel sorry for myself for even doing that to Angel.lifting the curse," Buffy sighed, "I blame myself."  
  
"Don't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault, it was an accident," Spike said. Buffy gave a tiny nod and let a few tears fall. Spike lifted his hand up and wiped them away, "It's all in the past. Just try and forget it if you can. Take care." Spike walked away into the darkness. Buffy walked inside her house and up the stairs to her room. She sat down on her bed and picked up her Claddagh ring from her nightstand. Hot tears fell down her face as she looked hard at the ring and held it close to her heart. She lay down on the bed and cried to sleep. 


	4. Too Emotional

Faith was hanging out in her apartment the next morning when she heard a knock on her door. She got up and opened the door to see Buffy standing there, "Mornin' B, didn't know you were coming here."  
  
"I decided to drop by and see how you were doing," Buffy shrugged.  
  
Faith stepped aside to let Buffy in and closed the door behind her, "So what's up?"  
  
Buffy turned to face Faith, "Nothing really."  
  
"You have something on your mind that's bothering you," Faith said, "I can tell by your eyes, they're red. Please tell me Angel didn't do anything to hurt you. If he did I'll kick his ass!"  
  
Buffy shook her head, "No, Angel never did anything. I think it was what I did to him a few years ago."  
  
Faith realized what Buffy was talking about, "B, you're not letting some accident take over your mind are you? It's wasn't your fault or Angel's."  
  
"Thank you Dr. Faith, I feel so much better," Buffy said sarcastically, "I can't get it out of my head. It's some kind of nightmare that won't leave me alone."  
  
"I know how that feels. It's kind of how my watcher died right in front of me; it was horrible. It was stuck in my head until I came here and we both defeated Kakistos. The nightmare was out of my head the next day," Faith told Buffy, "You have to try and forget it, I know it's hard."  
  
Buffy let out a deep sigh then sat down at the edge of Faith's bed, "I try to but it keeps coming back. Killing Angel didn't work, and when he came back.it all starts coming back."  
  
"You're saying that it has something to do with Angel's return?" Faith asked.  
  
"I-I don't know. God, I hope not. I keep thinking it's my fault.I wasn't acting like I should have. I-I was being foolish and I wasn't thinking right," Buffy put her head in her hands.  
  
Faith patted Buffy on the shoulder, "Stop blaming yourself Buffy. It was an accident."  
  
"No it wasn't Faith!" Buffy stood up, "You don't understand.you don't. That accident ruined my life. I was expelled from school, kicked out of my own house for a short while and after sending him to Hell, I left town to try and forget it but I couldn't. This has taken over my life." She opened the door and walked out leaving Faith watching with a sad and confused look on her face. 


	5. Former Lovers Now?

Buffy entered the Bronze later that night and headed up the balcony stairs. Willow gazed up at the balcony then faced Xander and Oz, "Something's wrong with her. Faith told me that she was pretty angry when she left Faith's house."  
  
"Teenage hormones. Everybody has them, even us," Xander said proudly, "It's nothing to be ashamed of."  
  
"I don't think it's that Xander," Oz shook his head, "Seems that something's bothering her, she hasn't even came over and said hi to us."  
  
Willow sighed, "Something's wrong with her, I can tell. She just doesn't want to tell us. Maybe Angel will find out what's bothering her."  
  
"You can tell him cause he just came in right now," Oz pointed to the entrance. Angel walked over to the table, "Hey guys, have you seen Buffy?"  
  
Willow, Oz and Xander all pointed to the balcony. Angel went up the stairs to Buffy, "Hey Buffy."  
  
Buffy didn't turn around, "Hi Angel."  
  
"You ok?" he asked sounding concerned. Buffy nodded without facing him, "I'm fine.just peachy."  
  
Angel turned her around, "Something's bothering you I know it."  
  
"Nothing's bothering me Angel, stop worrying about me. I'm fine. I'm just not in the talkative mood right now," she pulled her hands from his grip.  
  
"What is wrong with you Buffy? You haven't acted like this since the week you came back from summer vacation with your father after you killed the Master. I don't understand what's going on with you," Angel said nearly raising his voice at her.  
  
Buffy took a few steps back from him, "You gotta stop sticking your nose in my personal life. I know you're in it but you don't need to know everything that's going on with me. I don't do it to you."  
  
Angel was speechless and angry at the same time. Buffy moved past Angel and headed down the stairs out the door. Willow and Xander watched with shocked looks on their faces. Cordelia came over to the table, "What's her deal?"  
  
"No clue but it probably has something to do with Angel cause look at him," Xander said, "I haven't seen that look on his face in a long time. Poor guy."  
  
Cordelia nodded and sat down next to Xander. Angel stared at the door after Buffy left and shook his head sadly. Willow watched as Angel walked downstairs and out the doors. 


	6. Some Friendly Advice

Buffy walked inside the graveyard to start patrolling. Spike was sitting on a tombstone when he looked up to see Buffy, "You look down."  
  
Buffy turned her head, "What makes you say that?"  
  
"The way you look, your expressions on your face and a little bit of your attitude so to speak," Spike stood up.  
  
"Oh great, another counseling session. Remind the secretary that I want a full refund back," Buffy walked off.  
  
Spike caught up to her, "This isn't a counseling session love, I was just curious on why you don't look so happy."  
  
"You wanna know why? It's because there are a bunch of people who are bugging me and won't leave me alone for once. You're one of them," she snapped, "I just came here to patrol, not to socialize with vampires who want to talk and take me through therapy."  
  
"Didn't know you felt that way, I'll leave. Just to give you a heads-up, there's a vampire right behind you," Spike said.  
  
Buffy quickly turned around and punched the vamp. She turned to face Spike, "You can make yourself useful and help me here." Spike didn't move a muscle. He just watched as Buffy and the vamp were fighting. She took out her stake from her jacket pocket and staked the vamp then went over to Spike, "Boy, you're a lot of help. I thought you were here to help "save the world" and whatnot."  
  
"I said I was gonna leave but I decided to watch the match. I should have betted on him," Spike shrugged, "Guy sure put up a good fight."  
  
"You are such a pain in the ass," Buffy walked away.  
  
Spike smiled, "Took you long enough to figure it out huh? It's not my fault I'm that way, it's the way you've been treating me like I'm some kind of animal."  
  
Buffy stopped and turned around, "You are Spike."  
  
"Don't forget Angel, he's one too. Soul or no soul," Spike added sounding a little hurt.  
  
"Yeah well, I don't have to worry about that anymore," Buffy continued walking, "It's all in the past like you wanted it to be and it's gonna stay there."  
  
"Buffy," Spike called out but she was already out of the graveyard, "This is not a good night for anyone." He sighed and walked into his crypt. 


	7. Asking for Help

Willow sat in her bedroom typing on her computer when a knock came from her balcony window. She got up from her chair and opened the window, "Angel.w- what brings you here?"  
  
"I need your help," he answered, "You were the only one I could turn to. Xander's no help and Giles.I don't think so."  
  
"Oh sure," she said walking to her computer, "Oh!! I invite you...in."  
  
Angel gave a small smile and walked inside, closing the door behind him. Willow turned to face him, "So, what do you need help on?"  
  
"Well, I wanted to talk to you about Buffy. I'm really concerned about her and her attitude," Angel said sounding a little sad.  
  
"Oh.yeah, I saw what happened back there. I don't understand why she did that. That was un-like Buffy.again," Willow said, "It was weird."  
  
Angel nodded as he sat down on Willow's bed, "Is it me?"  
  
"What??" Willow asked in surprise.  
  
"Did I do something to make her mad? I don't know what got over her.it's strange," Angel looked down at his hands.  
  
Willow went over and sat down next to Angel, "Angel, I don't think you did anything wrong. I think she just needs some time alone, don't worry Angel, eventually she'll get over it I hope."  
  
Angel lifted his head up a little, "I hope she does. I don't like it when she acts that way.it hurts me inside you know?"  
  
"Yeah, it hurts. But I think it hurts more to you than us," Willow sighed, "You should try talking to her about it, if that doesn't help.I don't know what will. But it's worth a try."  
  
"I guess I should try it," Angel nodded.  
  
Willow stood up and went over to turn off her computer. Her mother knocked on the door, "Willow? Are you still up? It's late."  
  
"A.I'm going to bed in a minute Mom!" Willow called back then whispered to Angel, "Go on!"  
  
Angel got up and went to the window, "Thanks Willow for your help." Willow smiled and watched Angel leave before closing the window and going to bed. 


	8. Finding Out

Buffy walked down the streets the next night when she sensed someone behind her. Acting quickly, she turned around and backhanded the person behind not realizing that it was Angel, "Oh.sorry, didn't know it was you."  
  
"It's ok," he said holding his jaw for a little bit.  
  
"Now I have two stalkers on my hand. I kinda got rid of the other one the other night," Buffy said folding her arms.  
  
"What happened to your arms?" he asked her indicating the cuts on both of her arms.  
  
She put her sweatshirt sleeves down and put her arms behind her back, "Nothing.I just cut myself on my lawn. I didn't know that there were small pieces of glass there."  
  
"Are you ok?" his voice sounded calm and concerned.  
  
She nodded but kept her arms behind her back. Angel had a suspicious look on his then shrugged and walked away. Buffy gave a small sigh of relief then headed toward the graveyard and sat on a tombstone. She took out a small pocket knife that she had received as a gift from Faith during Christmas the year before. Her reflection shone on the blade of the knife as she put it down to her arm and cut herself slowly. A bead of blood fell from the wound and onto the ground. Angel came up from behind her and snatched the knife away, "What are you doing Buffy!?"  
  
"I'm not doing anything," she lied quickly without turning around to face him, "I'm patrolling what does it look like? I don't need you breathing down my back every night."  
  
"And finding out what you're doing I think I have a good reason to be around," he said raising his voice, "Why are you doing this?"  
  
Buffy stood and faced him, "You wouldn't want to know."  
  
"I do Buffy, I don't want anything bad happening to you. You know I love and care about you, I can't stand letting you do this," Angel said.  
  
"Then leave me alone. I don't want this to happen anymore than you do. But you wouldn't understand," she nearly cried, "I want to be alone."  
  
Angel shook his head, "No Buffy, I'm not going anywhere. I don't want you to do this, it hurts me to see you like this."  
  
"Just get away from me," Buffy backed away, "I can't stand this. I can't stand this...it-it's too hard to talk about it." She turned around and ran out of the graveyard in tears. Angel watched her leave sadly. He sat down on a tombstone and looked down at the drop of blood on the ground then lifted his head up to the entrance. 


	9. A message from Xander

Buffy ran inside her house and went up to her room. She didn't know that Spike was sitting on her window sill. When she looked up, she nearly screamed, "Spike, what the hell are you doing here?"  
  
"I was watching you and Angel. What happened back there Buffy? It's not like you," Spike said calmly.  
  
"God, can't you just leave me alone? Damn it, why is everyone intruding in my private life!? Why is that? Is my life some kind of door you can just walk in? I hate it!" Buffy shouted.  
  
Spike leaned against the sill, "It's not out fault. We're here to help Buffy. You know it."  
  
"Just leave me alone Spike," she said in anger, "I don't want to talk to anyone right now. I'm going through a hard time and you're making it worse. Just leave."  
  
"Fine, I'll leave. But I don't think you should take your anger out on others," Spike said before leaving. Buffy burst into tears and sat on her bed with her head in her hands.  
  
Buffy was lying on her bed when her door opened. Joyce glanced inside, "Honey? Are you ok?"  
  
"Fine Mom. I'm fine," she answered trying to hold back the tears of sadness and anger, "I'm not feeling well."  
  
"Do you need anything? I could run to the store and get a few things," Joyce said.  
  
"No Mom, I'm ok. I'm not hungry. I'm just gonna stay here the rest of the day," Buffy sighed, clutching her pillow. Joyce closed the door quietly, headed downstairs and turned the answering machine on. A few hours later, phone calls from Willow and Faith filled the answering machine. Buffy covered her head under her pillow trying not to listen to their anger, sadness and concernment. Memories of the past filled her head, many were the times she and Angel spent together, Willow and Xander hanging out with her and her friendship with Faith. Her phone rang again and she had no intention to even pick it up.  
  
"Buffy? It's Xander. I just heard about what you tried to do last night; you shouldn't do it Buffy. We need you here.everybody does even Giles. You're his Slayer and he's like a father to you. Buffy, please don't do this. Think about all the people who will miss you if you do it.especially Angel. Don't you think he doesn't care if you're gone? He loves you so much and you know that. Just think about it. Bye." The answering machine beeped.  
  
"Oh god." she whispered to herself. She cried hard as memories flashed through her head. Sad songs filled her head as she tried to stop crying. 


	10. Worried Friends

Willow walked down the street with Xander and Oz, "Do you think she even bothered to listen to the messages I left?"  
  
"I'm sure she listened to the one I left. I almost cried when I said it," Xander put his hands in his pockets, "Don't make fun of me but after I said it I did."  
  
"I'm not, I cried when I left mine. I cried on all of the messages I left. She shouldn't do it.I know a few of my family members who did," Willow said in a small voice.  
  
Oz put his arm around her, "I know how it feels Will, my cousin threatened to do it but I talked him out of it. I hope I did the same to Buffy when I left her the message."  
  
Willow nodded slightly. Faith met up with them, "Hey guys."  
  
"Hey Faith, you ok?" Xander asked her.  
  
Faith shook her head, "I'm worried about Buffy. This just isn't like her. I- I just don't understand what's wrong with her."  
  
"No one does," Angel said walking over to them, "Not even me."  
  
"I don't like this at all," Oz said then turning to Willow, "Did you tell Giles?"  
  
Willow gave another nod, "He was pretty shocked, angry and sad all at the same time. I could tell by the way he talked into the phone. I got scared, I didn't want to get him all upset but my conscious told me it was the right thing to do."  
  
"It was Willow, that was pretty brave," Angel said. Willow gave him a small smile of thanks then sighed, "I'm scared.I don't want Buffy to do anything bad." Oz kissed the side of her head as she put her head down on his shoulder. Angel glanced over to the graveyard to see if Buffy was there but she wasn't.  
  
"Social hour?" Cordelia asked walking over, "Where's Buffy? Didn't she get the messages you guys left?"  
  
"Apparently not but I sure hope she listened to my message," Xander said crossing his arms, "Did you leave any?"  
  
Cordelia shrugged, "I left one but I doubt it that she heard it. I'm sure mine wasn't as good as yours. But it was worth a shot, I mean.I'm not that good with the touchy-feely stuff but I tried."  
  
"Good thing you did Cor, we're trying to talk her out of it but I don't think it's working," Xander said walking away. Willow sighed, "I hope she's ok."  
  
Angel was silent for a moment, "I do too." He turned and headed back to his mansion. 


	11. Fight between Lovers

Rain started to fall into the late evening. Some splashed across Buffy's window as she still lay on her bed with her back to the door. She got up, grabbed her coat and walked outside. The rain fell down hard as Buffy walked down the streets. She walked into the graveyard and looked around. Seeing that the coast was clear, she took out a thick blade knife from her pocket. Angel came out from behind a tree, "Buffy!"  
  
Buffy jumped up startled, "Angel, leave me alone."  
  
"No Buffy I won't. I can't let you do this. You have to stop this right now," he shouted.  
  
"You think you can kick my ass don't you," she said.  
  
"What?" Angel asked, "No, I don't."  
  
Buffy smirked and walked in front of him, "You're scared aren't you. Big ol' vampire too scared to beat up a little Slayer, never thought I'd see the day."  
  
Angel looked at her, "I'm not gonna fight you Buffy."  
  
"Good," she said punching him across the face, "Cause I'm in the mood to fight you. Come on Angel, you can't beat me." She hit him again.  
  
He grabbed her arm, "Buffy, I don't want to fight you." She tried to hit him again but he moved in time, "Too scared?" She kicked him across the head. He went down but came up sporting his game face, "Alright, you want a fight? Let's do it."  
  
"Good, cause I've been wondering when you were gonna change," she said while kicking him in the stomach. He grabbed her leg and pulled her down to the ground hard. She jumped up to her feet and backhanded him, "What's the matter Angel? You're weak for crying out loud. I thought you were stronger than that."  
  
"You haven't seen nothing yet," he kicked her hard in the face.  
  
"Is it me or are you not doing this right?" she snapped and took out a vial of holy water. Angel backed away a few steps, "Buffy, don't even."  
  
"Do what?" This?" she took off the cap and threw the water. He dodged it and charged after her knocking her to the ground. He grabbed her by the throat and pinned her down on a tombstone, "Enough Buffy."  
  
"Why can't you just leave me alone?" she cried, "I-I killed you and it didn't work."  
  
Angel had now found out what was bothering her. She flung her arms around him and cried on his shoulder, "Make it stop Angel.please. I don't want to die, help me."  
  
"It's ok Buffy, I won't let that happen," he said changing back to his human face. 


	12. Worried Mother

Buffy opened the front door to her home and walked inside but turned around, "Come on in Angel."  
  
Angel stepped inside and followed closely behind her. Joyce came in from the kitchen, "Buffy, where have you been? I just heard all the messages Willow, Faith and Xander had left you. Are you crazy?"  
  
"Mom, don't worry. I'm not going to do it. I kinda had it beaten out of me," Buffy said softly, "I promise, I won't even think about doing it again."  
  
Joyce put her arms around her daughter, "I don't want you to do it Buffy. You wouldn't know how hard it would be on me and not to mention your friends and Angel. Oh god Buffy, please don't do it."  
  
Buffy closed her eyes and tried to fight back the tears, "I'm not Mom, I'm not. I have reasons why I'm not going to.good ones. I'm sorry if I scared you like that, I didn't mean to."  
  
"It's alright honey. I'm just happy that you're ok and that's all that matters to me. You know that," Joyce let go of Buffy, "Just, please don't do it again."  
  
Buffy nodded as Joyce walked back into the kitchen. Buffy nudged Angel to follow her upstairs to her room. She sat down on her bed with him then faced him, "Angel, this will be hard for me to tell you the truth on why I was going to do it. It may hurt you as well."  
  
"I think I can handle it Buffy, I just hope it's nothing too personal," Angel looked in her eyes. Buffy took a deep breath, "It's just.I didn't think we should be around each other after knowing what had happened. I thought it would be best if I wasn't around to do it again but then I realized how much it is to be here.with you because I love you so much that my heart just doesn't fully function. Now I know that, I was meant to be with you and I love being around you it's just, I don't want to make the same mistakes."  
  
Angel held her hand tight, "I know how it feels Buffy, I don't want to make the same mistakes also. But that just proves how much we love each other. You're the one thing I think about."  
  
"You too," she said looking down. He lifted her chin up, "You're the one thing that matters to me and I don't want to lose you. It'll be hard on me and especially your mom and your friends."  
  
Buffy quickly wiped the tears from her eyes, "I felt the same way when I had to send you to Hell.I couldn't get over it, it tore my heart apart. I couldn't stand it. I love you."  
  
"I love you too Buffy," he said and kissed her passionately. She put her arms around his neck as the kiss continued. He pulled away gently, "Thank God you're still here." She smiled and kissed him again. 


	13. Happy Scooby Gang

Willow sat on the couch with Oz in the Bronze the next night. Xander and Cordelia were right in front of them on the other couch. Willow was twitchy a little, "Have you seen Buffy at all today? I'm worried."  
  
"I haven't seen her," Cordelia shook her head, "You don't think she?"  
  
"No way of course not. She wouldn't.I know she wouldn't," Xander said to Cordelia before facing Willow, "Right?"  
  
Willow bit her lower lip as Oz put his arm around her, "I hope she's ok. We haven't heard from her in two days, her mom said she didn't see her earlier last night. Oh god! I'm starting to panic here!"  
  
"No need to panic Will, I'm right here," Buffy said, "And I'm not going anywhere again."  
  
Xander immediately jumped up, "Buffy! You're ok!" He gave her a big bear hug, "We thought we lost you."  
  
"Need breathing," Buffy squeaked.  
  
"Oh sorry," Xander let go of her. Willow gave Buffy a small hug, "I got so worried! I don't know what I would do without you here."  
  
Buffy gave a small smile, "Yeah, luckily I'm not going to do it. Someone had to stop me or actually beat it out of me."  
  
"Let me guess.Faith?" Cordelia asked. Buffy shook her head, "Angel."  
  
Willow widened her eyes, "Angel? He actually did that?"  
  
"No, I started it and he finished it. He had me by the throat and just looking in his eyes made me burst into tears and begged him to help me. It was so emotional," Buffy put her arms around herself, "I can't even get over it right now but I hope it will."  
  
"Have you talked to Faith or Giles?" Oz asked her. Buffy shook her head again and sighed, "Do you think I should tell them? It's best if they know."  
  
"You should Buffy, they should know about it," Xander said, "You have my full support. I'll tell Faith if she comes here."  
  
"Thanks Xander. If you see Angel, tell him I'm probably either at Faith's or Giles' place," Buffy walked out of the Bronze doors. Willow gave Oz and Xander a smile before finishing her Sprite. Cordelia finished the rest of her cappuccino before sitting down next to Xander on the couch, "What would the world be like without Buffy?" Xander just shrugged, he didn't even want to think about the answer to the question. 


	14. Always Need You

Buffy approached Faith's apartment door and knocked on it. She put her hands in her pocket while waiting. The door opened as Buffy looked up. Faith was standing in the doorway, "B.hey."  
  
"Hey," Buffy bit her lip. Faith stared at Buffy for a minute, "Come on in." Buffy walked inside as Faith closed the door behind her then faced her.  
  
"So, what brings you here?" Faith sat down on her bed, arms crossed.  
  
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm not going to do it. Angel had to beat the hell out of me to make me stop. I didn't get a chance to listen to the messages you left me but I listened to Xander's. I went to the graveyard to go do it but Angel stopped me and we ended up getting into a big fight and I ended up bursting into tears and holding him," Buffy said in a small voice. A few tears fell down.  
  
Faith was speechless at first, "B, I'm just happy you're still here." She gave Buffy a hug, "I can't slay without a friend by my side." Buffy gave her a smile, "I'm here for you Faith." A knock came on the door. Faith went to go answer it and Giles and Angel were standing in the doorway. Buffy looked up at them and swallowed hard.  
  
"Buffy," Giles whispered, "Thank heavens you're alright. Willow told me a few days ago and you had me worried." Buffy looked down in shame as Angel put his arms around her. Giles walked over to her, "I'm not mad Buffy, I'm just happy you're alright."  
  
"I'm sorry Giles, I was stupid and foolish. I-I wasn't thinking straight," Buffy said still looking down, "You probably hate me for trying to do it."  
  
"No, no Buffy of course I don't and you know it. Everybody here wants you to stay; your Mom, Willow, Xander, Oz, Cordelia, Faith, Angel even me," Giles said to her, "We need you here because.you're MY Slayer."  
  
Buffy lifted her head and smiled, "Thanks Giles." Giles gave her a small smile before walking out.  
  
"I'm glad you're still here. I can't do the slaying without you," Faith said leaning against the door.  
  
"I'm glad too Faith," Buffy gave a small nod then looked at Angel, "Good thing I have reasons why my life is better here on Earth." Angel smiled at her.  
  
"Yeah, so I'll see you later right?" Faith asked while taking off her leather jacket and putting it away in her closet. Buffy took a deep breath, "Yeah, I'll see you later. Take care Faith." She got up and walked out with Angel right behind her. Faith watched them as they left, "Thank God we'll always have B around to save the day or even save the world." She smiled and closed the door behind her. 


End file.
